Neoclassical X-TREME!* : Life and Law in Angie-Land

When we hire "public defenders," we should really mean it. The job of the "public defender" is to strive manfully against the prosecutor in the bloody ring of gladiatorial combat, to the entertainment of the jury. (Refreshments will be served). The prosecutor will be armed with a gladius, a helmet, and arm protection, while the public defender will be armed with a net and trident, wearing only a loincloth and an anointment of olive oil over his gleaming body.

This serves two purposes:

1) The "public defender" will now actually have an incentive to, you know, defend, the poor and the weak.

2) It might then actually be fun to do jury duty.

3) Every other country can have their fruity columns, nice inscriptions about Justice, Reason and Enlightenment, and call themselves "neo-classical." We're the only country that's hardcore about it.

*sponsored by Mountainus Dewus. Do the Dew.

As An Amusement For Myself

Helena Helena Helena Troy
taunts the girls and tempts the boys
cross the sea in Troy's black ships
armies bleeding at your lips

bright-eyed beauty pyre-lit
false and pretty, can't commit
want a boyfriend think you will
how many people have you killed?
1...2... 3... 4..