I have a.. boyfriend?

What the hell just happened? Sprouting from a random conversation. Oh, Alex, this is the guy I introduced you to. Who works for the Louisiana Renaissance festival.

SFX 87: I feel I ought to tell you that they got Bill the Pony in Rivendell in the movie.

Fiend Lich: ...

SFX 87: well you were wondering where they got him.

Fiend Lich: wow...how...crappy.

SFX 87: Well it's better than having him appear from nowhere.

Fiend Lich: *mutter*

SFX 87: *mutter*
SFX 87: I have also decided that Eomer is incredibly studly.

Fiend Lich: yep.

SFX 87: I want to have his children
SFX 87: but also Aragorn's.
SFX 87: and Legolas'

Fiend Lich: ...

SFX 87: and Faramir's.
SFX 87: So you see I'll be busy for a while.
SFX 87: I apologize in advance for even bringing up Faramir.

Fiend Lich: and theodrek's! and theodrek's!!
Fiend Lich: *ducks* :P

SFX 87: Speaking of which..

Fiend Lich: This doesn't sound like it'll bode well. :P
Fiend Lich: What?

SFX 87: Will you write me a Dating Recommendation?
SFX 87: ^__^

Fiend Lich: ...er...?

SFX 87: Just a little sheet on what a good date I'll make so I can pass it around to people.
SFX 87: I mean, obviously, I can't expect people to date me who don't even know me.

Fiend Lich: ...er...
Fiend Lich: That's not really how you should go around doing it.

SFX 87: So I bet they'll be reassured to know that other people find me to be a good bet.
SFX 87: ^__^
SFX 87: Hey, my friend has dating applications.

Fiend Lich: How crappy.
Fiend Lich: Really.

SFX 87: I've seen dating resumes too.

Fiend Lich: I've seen 12 year olds with four girlfriends.

Fiend Lich: That doesn't make it right.

SFX 87: *shrug* it's a better way than some.
SFX 87: I don't think anyone means it seriously, besides.

Fiend Lich: *rolls eyes*
Fiend Lich: Don't do sheets...
Fiend Lich: Just be yourself.

SFX 87: It is rather original, and a better method than pickup lines.

Fiend Lich: You'll find someone.

SFX 87: Eomer! :-D

Fiend Lich: Someone in your range.
Fiend Lich: Who isn't a major film star and such.

SFX 87: Well I could become a major star and balance it all out.

Fiend Lich: :P

Fiend Lich: Why not me! I'm willing! *raises hand meekishly*

SFX 87: awww..
SFX 87: *smooch* So cute.
SFX 87: ^__^

Fiend Lich: And I'm house broken!
Fiend Lich: ;.;

SFX 87: I promised not to do this online dating thing again though.

Fiend Lich: And I like to cuddle...!

SFX 87: @___@ So cute!!!!

Fiend Lich: *sniffles*

SFX 87: *whimpers*

Fiend Lich: *puppy eyes*
Fiend Lich: And I'll adore and worship you and everything!

SFX 87: @___@

Fiend Lich: *hugs your ankles* Pweese? ;.;
Fiend Lich: I...I...um...I will do breakfast in bed?
Fiend Lich: I give foot rubs...?

SFX 87: but not at the same time!
SFX 87: (breakfast in bed with foot rubs..)

Fiend Lich: Well, yes. ^_^

SFX 87: strange
SFX 87: and unhygenic

Fiend Lich: But I'll do them both seperately!
Fiend Lich: And...and...

SFX 87: @___@
SFX 87: So cute!!!!
SFX 87: *dies*

Fiend Lich: ...did I mention I like to cuddle and snuggle and generally be together? ;.;
Fiend Lich: and how what I'd really like to do is wrap myself and someone up in a blanket really tight and just cuddle and lay together?

SFX 87: except you live in Louisiana
SFX 87: unless you're travelling ectoplasm, this presents some problems.

Fiend Lich: -_-
Fiend Lich: Blah.
Fiend Lich: ...but...I like to cuddle...!! Please? ;.;

SFX 87: Uh.. (breaks out).. I'll think about it?
SFX 87: but nuthin' too serious

Fiend Lich: ;__;
Fiend Lich: okay!

SFX 87: Yay! Someone to smack around!

Fiend Lich: Just...foot rubs!
Fiend Lich: yes! you can smack me!

SFX 87: *smacks* Woohoo!

Fiend Lich: ^_^
Fiend Lich: I'll be your bitch? o.O
Fiend Lich: I don't care! ^_^;;

SFX 87: ey!
SFX 87: but no
SFX 87: Not the bitch thing. I don't like housepets.

Fiend Lich: *shrug*
Fiend Lich: Okay.

SFX 87: Random question. Would you like Ranch or House Vinagrette on your salad?

Fiend Lich: Ranch.
Fiend Lich: If available, Russian.
Fiend Lich: Or Catalina.

SFX 87: What's Russian? Vodka?

Fiend Lich: No! Salad dressing.

SFX 87: Vodka flavored salad dressing?

Fiend Lich: No alcohol.

SFX 87: okee. What's Catalina?

Fiend Lich: Salad dressing.
Fiend Lich: Red kind of. It's good, though.

SFX 87: I'll take your word for it. Never had it.

Fiend Lich: Okay.

And so forth. If you want more of the transcript, ask me. There's some stuff on.. asking for my picture, more ankle hugging, awkwardness on my side (maybe not for him), and 8 Bit Theater. I was quite grateful for this webcomic from waving me from stupid relationship awkwardness. Still don't know if I'm dating him or not. Mental Note: He seems to take jokes rather literally.

It was a rather crappy day to start out with. In Chinese we had to finish up translating a poem about 911 into Chinese, and the sickening tackiness of it had me pissed off well into second period. The thing on the end saying "send this to at least 10 people! DON'T BREAK THE CHAIN!!!!!!!" did not help. I didn't have my math homework done, and it happened that, not having collected homework in the previous three weeks, Ms. Gesterling decided today would be a good day to do it. Now, if I had checked my planbook toroughly and realized that the homework was a worksheet and I didn't need the textbook to do it, I could've done it during the morning announcements, or even during the six minutes between classes, but no, I saw the textbook excercises in the planbook and somehow my eye skipped over the worksheet problems. Third period had me nervous over my TOK presentation, which we did not get to finish because at the beginnning of the period Ms. Sullivan had spent fifteen minutes grilling Herschel, who was in the previous group that hadn't finished yesterday. I was immensely satisfied to overhear Herschel bitching about it during archaeology later. Since Nick is going on a college visit tomorrow, we gave Anya Nick's part to finish, meaning that tomorrow we get to see Anya Kouklova wearing a pair of sock puppets alternating between a falsetto and a bass. Stayed after school for Archaeology, which involved the spilling of various soft drinks in room 215, and.. cataloguing. -_-. The cataloguing group before us left us with a generous gift of rusty nails. Ironically, Rob and Gordon and I had been cataloguing that very same bag last year and had meticulously avoided the nails, hoping the next group could do them, but with me getting the same bag two years in a row, I ended up staring at nails anyways. Andrew came over and tried to explain to my group of bewildered novices and myself the difference between rusty fencing wire, rusty electrical wire and rusty barbed wire, though all I got out of it was that barbed wire has barbs. As I was leaving my E.E. advisor sprung on me to tell me that I'm 1000 words under the lower limit, I need footnotes, a works cited, a title page, and an abstract by next Friday.

But the latter half of the day was much better. After archaeology I bumped into Silvia in the school's front lobby, and she said she could use a ride home, so my mom gave her a ride home, and she decided that since I was sitting in a car right in front of her apartment that I might as well stay for a few hours to study for the physics test. So I did, though honestly I think I could've studied more efficiently by myself. We did a lot of talking though, which was really great, and it was sort of amusing how my mom called Alex asking him for Silvia's phone number to call me, and Alex told Silvia on Aim. Silvia told me, and I called my mom, who was surprised that all of this could have ensued within a span of 30 seconds. Stayed on with Silvia's hyperspastic five year old sister, who was immensely amused by my TOK sock puppets and we had loads of fun removing and retaping the puppets' round paper eyeballs in different places on their faces, and making new eyes and clothes for them. This is the only use TOK has ever been to me. Later wadded up the socks into a giant ball with ponytail holders, and played Sockeyball with Silvia in her front yard, like volleyball but with socks. Silvia's sister was annoyed at us not playing with her, so I went back to playing Socky with Cindy while Silvia played real volleyball with her dad. Silvia got on the phone with Josh and I ended up playing chess with Cindy until her attention span died, and then won a game of Chinese checkers. I stayed for dinner, though I felt awkward about it, and sort of weird trying to talk in Mandarin, but it was nice anyways. It was rather a pleasant afternoon and evening, and I wish I could hang out with people more.

The sock puppets will need new eyeballs because the tape adhesive is going.

SFX 87: that sword thing he [Link] does is physically impossible
SFX 87: pulling a sword out of a scabbard he wears on his back
VortexMR: the spinny what?
SFX 87: that too
VortexMR: why is pulling it out of his back imposible?
SFX 87: because I tried it, and it's basically impossible if the sword is longer than your arm. Think about it.
SFX 87: he can do it with the short sword. But not the long sword.
VortexMR: does he pull the goron sword out of his back?
VortexMR: and it would be possible, if the botton of the scabbard was not hooked to anything, so that it could tilt up
SFX 87: Noo.
SFX 87: it's impossible
SFX 87: Even tilting up
SFX 87: it's possible at your waist because you can move your arm in an arc
SFX 87: and the scabbard tilts with you
SFX 87: actually, hmm
VortexMR: wait a minute... your right... how the heck could ANY sword slonger then your arm be goten out of a scabard in one fluid motion?
VortexMR: well if it's at your waist, if it's longer then your arm plus the line from your sholder to the scabord
SFX 87: try it.
VortexMR: ware am i going to get a large sword and scabard?
VortexMR: link pulls everything but his sword and his sheild out of a fanny pack!
SFX 87: so actually the length of the sword would be less than the length from your hand to the scabbard, which is longer than the length of your arm
VortexMR: that's what i said, from your arm to your sholder across your body to the scabard
VortexMR: the link cartoon actualy exsplains that
SFX 87: That's only if you're drawing your sword parallel to your body. I think people would usually wear swords on their back for travel, because if you wore it at your waist it'd be annoying for walking long distances.
VortexMR: or if you want you be able to do stuff with your hands
SFX 87: rightyo
VortexMR: in the link cartoon you see him like shove bow and arrows into his fanny pack
SFX 87: So you'd think if you had it strapped to your back so it didn't get in the way, you wouldn't want it to wobble around, so it wouldn't be able to tilt, so you couldn't draw it from that position.
SFX 87: You'd have to strap it to your waist if you knew you were going into a battle or something. And if you get ambushed on the road, tough luck.
VortexMR: unless it was a short sword
SFX 87: yah
VortexMR: now when link to stuff out of the fanny pac, it was really small and grew back to normal size
VortexMR: he has a magical carry all fanny pack!
SFX 87: like a bag of holding
SFX 87: hmm, actually, I get this. The line from your hand to your scabbard (at waist level) is a lot longer than the line from your hand to your scabbard (when it's on your back)
SFX 87: it just is.
VortexMR: yeah i know
SFX 87: so if it was a long swordy you couldn't draw it
SFX 87: from your back
SFX 87: much less sheath it into your back
SFX 87: like young link does, even with a short sword
SFX 87: cuz even with scabbards at your waist, you sort of have to hold the scabbard still and make sure you don't miss the hole and stuff.
VortexMR: actualy you could sheith it, get the tip in there and then shove it up
SFX 87: you could, but you can't see it cuz it's on your back

Amusing conversation with Silvia, regarding a post on Alex's Blog.

SFX 87: Alex is spanking the monkey.
chimpberry: wut monkey?
SFX 87: it's a game he's playing
chimpberry: oh ok
SFX 87: do you wanna play?
chimpberry: no, I don't hav time
SFX 87: he's seeing how fast he can finish it.
SFX 87: ok

SFX 87: http://www.anastrophe.co.za/article.php3?article_id=23 This is the funniest thing in the whole world.
SFX 87: Don't let them Nigerians rape my maid!
IHateIB: Nick's coming with us.
SFX 87: to rape my maid?
IHateIB: Hence the "coming."

Strange, strange conversations.

SFX 87: Hey, Azzie! What's your favorite dinosaur?
Azoriel: Hm... Before the whole Jurassic Park thing, it was Dienonychus (sp?). However, everybody's been into raptor-type dinosaurs since then, so I'm not sure anymore.
SFX 87: Heh. You do know that the JP raptors are totally unlike real raptors.
SFX 87: Real raptors were like, three feet tall.
SFX 87: the JP raptors I think were modeled off of deinonychus, but it probably would have been annoying to have actors running around yelling, "MY GOD! DEINONYCHUS!" You know how actors are.
Azoriel: *nods* They were only 6' long and ate protoceratops eggs.
Azoriel: *nods* I figured that as well... (Raptors are still pretty tiny though.)
SFX 87: evil but tiny
Azoriel: I would have chosen that Utahraptor dinosaur first (but I think those weren't discovered until after the book was written).
SFX 87: You're making this complicated, man! What's your favorite dinosaur????

SFX 87: Emmy's blogs are profound
SFX 87: s'not fair
SFX 87: i wanna be profound
IHateIB: Once in a while they are
SFX 87: but no one comments on them, so they must not be.
IHateIB: Right; she must have no friends.
SFX 87: some properties are inherent in objects- like, the apple is red, it's round. Some are objective, like.. if people perceive something to be profound, it is, if people perceive it to be inane, it is.
SFX 87: if no one perceives anything, my blog must not exist.
SFX 87: well, in terms of depth
SFX 87: the words are there.
IHateIB: You mean, subjective?
SFX 87: hushyourface.
SFX 87: The English language is my beeyatch
SFX 87: I've had too much SAT prep for people to be telling me what the English language is and isn't.
IHateIB: I think that profundity is fairly objective
SFX 87: "Ameliorate" my arse.
SFX 87: how?
IHateIB: It's derived from the human experience
SFX 87: ass
SFX 87: dammit
SFX 87: um...
SFX 87: okay
IHateIB: Or something like that that sounds less English classy
SFX 87: but what if I experience a styrofoam tray?
IHateIB: Well, that's unimportant.
IHateIB: OK, I see your argument.
IHateIB: Yeah, I don't really know why we see some things as profound and others not.
IHateIB: Maybe 'cause Emi relates little events to big statements in a way that doesn't seem corny and silly, she's profound.
SFX 87: well my argument is that something can't be profound if no one sees it as profound.. I guess an apple can still be red if everyone's blind, but it can't be tasty if no one has.. um.. taste buds.
SFX 87: right
IHateIB: Well, it's past 10:50
IHateIB: I'm really going to bed
SFX 87: nighty
SFX 87: FREAK
IHateIB: nightitynights
IHateIB signed off at 11:04:57 PM.

SFX 87: hmm. Just noticed. I'm commenting on your comment on Nick B's blog. One would think it'd be easier to just say it.
IHateIB: Just say that he's effeminate?
IHateIB: But it's not true.,
IHateIB: He's like afeminate and amasculine
IHateIB: He's like a sexless robot.
SFX 87: he's a monk, but not really
IHateIB: A truly sexless robot, not the ones that are masculine by defaul
IHateIB: t
SFX 87: he's like... a teddy bear
SFX 87: who are we talking about?
IHateIB: Shema
SFX 87: what?
SFX 87: I was talking about nkc
SFX 87: nkb
IHateIB: ok
IHateIB: I was discussing ss
IHateIB: heh
SFX 87: You could describe nkb as a sexless robot too
SFX 87: it's a bit worrying. He doesn't get this whole.. sex thing..
IHateIB: yeah, an affection robot
SFX 87: He's like the most asexual guy I know who talks about sex.
SFX 87: yeah
SFX 87: I mean, I don't know if Andrew and David and Rob are asexual, but they don't talk about being asexual as much, knowwhatimean?
SFX 87: change "as much" to "ever"
IHateIB: zah
SFX 87: is that a yes or a no?
IHateIB: You sort of ignore it until you think about it
SFX 87: Rob at least has been making really bad dirty jokes lately
IHateIB: a yes
SFX 87: mnkay
IHateIB: awww! That's adorable!
SFX 87: it'is creepy!
IHateIB: He's like finally getting to the social level of 3rd grade!
IHateIB: He's a big boy now!
IHateIB: (I'm really not this condescending)

Finally talked to Janis for the first time in a long while. Well, if you don't include the time when I talked to her for like five seconds and then she had to leave for dance. I've been finding it a bit hard to find things to talk about, amazingly. But she did come up with an answer to our conundrum, so I have to tell Nick HA!

SFX 87: We're coming up with a list of unlikely jobs for people. Do you think Andrew would be more unlikely to be a born again Christian in ten years or a new age hippie?
LittleForestElf: hmmm...let me think about that...
SFX 87: it boggles the mind.
LittleForestElf: both are extremely unlikely, however I think he's most unlikely to become a new age hippie because not only does it go against his lack of emotions, it also goes against all his economic and social tendencies. Being a born again christian he could still keep the same economic and social agenda

14% addicted to Instant Messenger. How about you?